6 Best Monster Dildos [Video Demonstration]

Shopping for a monster dildo can be tricky. The massive size can be unforgiving, making it essential to understand the actual length and girth before purchasing. So which of the many models and brands should I buy?

No sweat! After testing dozens of products we firmly believe Mr. Hankey’s Dragon is the highest-rated monster dildo. Its distinctive and fantasy-themed design makes it perfect for people who love intensely textured creature sex toys. The attention to detail is awe-inspiring, and the sheer size is imposing. I’m not one to be intimidated, but the size, texture, and craftsmanship were overwhelming.

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Why You Should Trust Us

The ladies at My Sex Toy Guide have tested over 300+ sex toys, including monster dildos. Combining experience and expertise from the team of sex experts was crucial for this article. Sandra Larson and the team personally tested dozens of products with our reader’s needs in mind.

Even though this review is as comprehensive as it gets, we’re still open to hearing from our readers who’d like to share their stories and thoughts, which could be included in this list. So, if you have any questions or suggestions, don’t hesitate to reach out. You can call Sandra at +1 307-372-3895 or send an email to [email protected]

 

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How We Picked the Products

Before distributing the carefully selected review samples, I briefed the team on essential test criteria that we could measure on a scale from 0 to 100. We worked to ensure the top picks reflected our reader’s sexual needs and preferences. Some of the criteria include the following:

• Design. Like other sex toys, there are numerous fantasy monster dildo designs and shapes. We included different shapes to give you many options for the dream monster sex toy.
• Size. Like the design, what works for you might not work for me. For this reason, I advised the team to focus on brands with multiple-size toys to pick the one that meets your experience.
• Firmness. Most monster dildos are designed to mimic mythical creatures like dragons and aliens or an ogre penis. Unfortunately, these creatures are associated with a degree of ‘difficulty’ and ‘brutality’ better suited for experienced folks. The team prioritized models with a variation in the firmness degree so you can choose between squishy and solid densities for maximum comfort.
• Build Quality. We only reviewed monster dildos made from body-safe silicone. Materials like rubber and other porous materials were strictly prohibited in the initial selection phase.
• Stimulation. The diverse selection included motorized options like sex machines and vibrating dildos. We also added unique toys like anal play models and tongue models. After all, tastes and preferences defer from one user to the other, and My Sex Toy Guide’s aim throughout the self-testing exercise was to match your sexual needs with the largest products we could find.
• Controls. Besides picking smaller-sized models to enhance handling for people with small hands, I recommended the team prioritize products with suction cup bases or provisions for the same. And for the motorized models, an intuitive control interface or remote control was a must-have.
• Price. Lastly, the team paid attention to the prices in relation to the build quality, design, size, and stimulations. The top picks embraced value for money. However, we included some of the best bargains for beginners on a budget looking to explore monster dildos without breaking the bank.

During testing, we rated each test criterion on a percentage scale from 0% (Worst) to 100% (Best). We then calculated the overall score using different weighted metrics depending on the importance of the test criteria. Half the total rating comes from Stimulations (25%) and Design (25%). After that comes Size (10%), Controls (10%), and Price (10%).

The entire exercise took about 25 days. Once the self-testing was done, my colleagues helped me analyze the findings. We handpicked the similarities from the reports and compared them to the organic user reviews. And from the rigorous and collaborative effort, we believe these are this year’s best monster dildos!

 

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Everything We Tested

In this chapter, you can see a comparison table with all the products we tested. As you can see, each row has the test criteria our team used during the testing. To make our testing process even more transparent, we also included the raw test data so you can see how the products performed with each test criteria.

 

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1. Mr. Hankey’s Dragon: Our Overall Test Winner!

Why we like Mr. Hankey’s Dragon:

Mr. Hankey’s Dragon is our favorite monster cock dildo and one of the best dildos we reviewed. The intricately designed sex toy is large and ‘animated’, making it perfect for people who love fantastical designs. Something that stood out during the review was the attention to detail. The textured grooves give the dildo a realistic look, which you can see in the image above. I was thrilled to explore the nubs and ridges whose height and width varied as you moved toward the base.

The enormous ridge around the middle had a small, pointy nub that slithered against the sensitive front wall, sparking an exciting blend of sensations. On the other hand, as you can see in the image below, the ridges down the back were gentle on the vaginal walls and provided a much-needed calm feeling to the thrusting. I enjoyed the sensation whenever I pressed the Dragon fiercer. In addition, pressing it against the vagina’s back wall allowed me to take in more length, and the broad tip meant the G-spot had nowhere to hide.

Note: Removing the Dragon was an experience in itself. Pulling it off required a good balance of pelvic muscle coordination and effort.

Mr. Hankey’s Dragon was intimidating. I chose the medium size, and the sheer size was astounding. There’s a small size for beginners, but it’s still substantial – pay attention to the measurements before buying the Dragon. It doesn’t come cheap anyway. If you’ve used entry-level monster dildos before and want to upgrade to something more significant, this beauty is your best bet. The more pronounced, realistic texture and elongated size offer a new adventure full of surprises.

The testers also noted the attachment hole option that lets you unlock many possibilities, including hands-free use with a suction hole and utilizing Vac-U-Lock compatible sex machines and accessories. Like most products on this list, you can choose between the medium-firm and 75% density. I opted for the medium-firm variant because it perfectly balanced squishiness and erectness. (You can see me testing the firmness in the below image).

Surprisingly, the Dragon feels delightful to hold and run my hands through, with a texture softer than other silicone toys.

Minor issues we found during testing:

Using the Dragon comes with its fair share of challenges. The bulbous head was thick, and the coronal ridge was more defined. I needed more lube and patience with the Bad Dragon than with other models on this list.

People who prefer smoother and more traditional textures will find Mr. Hankey’s Dragon intimidating. Even the smallest size is nearly 10 inches long, so pick the ideal size with your experience and comfort in mind. If you’re not comfortable with that, you can explore smaller dildos, to begin with.

Lastly, people who prefer intense thrusting will have to look elsewhere. The ultra-textured design is better enjoyed with slow and well-calculated thrusts.

Why Mr. Hankey’s Dragon is the best monster dildo:

• Design: The textured grooves handily handily beat the competition. Full stop. The attention to detail in crafting the texture was evident with the pronounced scales on the top and bottom surface of the shaft and the sophisticated snakeskin on the sides.
• Build Quality: Something else that stood out during the testing was the intimidating factor. Mr. Hankey’s Dragon was a sight to behold, with bespoke levels of craftsmanship and detail. It’s made from premium silicone, a durable, flexible, and easy-to-clean material.

If you want to see what Mr. Hankey’s Dragon Dildo looks like and how to use it, please watch our unboxing and demonstration video below:

You can read our Mr. Hankey’s Toys Dragon dildo review here.

Features:

• Material: Silicone
• Insertable Length: 8.5″ – 14″
• Circumference: 7.5″ – 12.75″

Pros:

• Dragon-inspired design with realistic snakeskin texture.
• Ideal for imaginative play fans.
• Different sizes and firmness degrees.
• Thick base for easy handling.
• Vac-U-Lock compatible.
• Multiple size options.

Cons:

• It didn’t come with a bag for storage.
• The detailed textures make cleaning complicated.

View On MrHankey

 

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2. Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle: Tentacle Monster Dildo!

Why we love Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle:

Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle is our favorite monster tentacle dildo. The unique texture with stimulating suckers on the topside highlighted the attention to detail. Unlike Mr. Hankey’s Dragon, it has a ‘friendlier’ design for penetration. The tapered tip (image above) made penetration more straightforward, even for people who are new to this niche.

The reviewers loved how the tentacle suckers made Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle versatile. Besides rubbing against the vaginal walls during G-spot stimulation, the suckers aided clit massage. I have a sensitive clit, and rubbing the topside (zoomed in the image below) against it felt amazing.

I tested with medium firmness, but some of my colleagues used 75% for comparison. The medium density is much easier to use because of the balance between firmness and squishiness. The 75% softness, on the other hand, was overly soft, and penetration took more time and effort.

People with sensitive G-spots or clits will enjoy the squishy model. Personally, the medium-firmness option was more impactful. I don’t mind the little bitty stiffness; the simplified penetration experience was a bonus. Unlike most review samples, Mr. Hankey Taintacle had a tapered design. Besides simplifying penetration, the fantasy-themed dildo promoted a gentle stretching experience.

Something else that was exciting about this hardcore monster dildo was the dynamism. It’s available in three sizes and two firmness options. In addition, you can add a Vac-U-Lock attachment hole.

Minor issues we found during testing:

The protruding suckers can be unforgiving, especially for folks with ultra-sensitive bits. I recommend the 75% softness model if you can’t have the heat.

I used the large variant, which felt heavy whenever I used it for more than three minutes. The Vac-U-Lock compatibility was helpful because I used Taintacle with a sex machine and suction cup base. However, the small and XXL sizes don’t have the feature, so people who use them must contend with a sore forearm.

Why Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle is the best tentacle dildo:

• Design: Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle’s blend of suckers and contours makes it a versatile pick for G-spot and clit stimulation fans. Its exciting S-shaped design, well-thought-out texture, and dynamic build beat the competition in this critical category.
• Control: The tapered build with a tapered tip and graduating size simplified penetration, and the testers ranked Tainticle as the easiest model to use. Unlike stocky models like Mr. Hankey’s Dragon, slithering Taintacle through the vagina was straightforward.

If you want to see what Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle looks like and how to use it, please watch our unboxing and demonstration video below:

You can read our Mr. Hankey’s Taintacle review here.

Features:

• Material: Silicone
• Insertable Length: 8″ – 14″
• Circumference: 6″ – 10.50″

Pros:

• Outstanding design.
• The tapered design enhances the gentle stretching experience.
• Sensual suckers were incredibly stimulating.
• The S-shaped design makes penetration easy.
• Multiple sizes and firmness options.
• The Vac-U-Lock hole opens your world to new possibilities.

Cons:

• Using Taintacle without a sex machine or suction cup was challenging.
• The suckers make cleaning tiresome.

View On MrHankey

 

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3. Icicles No. 24: Our Budget Pick!

Why we love Icicles No. 24:

Having tested numerous monster dildos, Icicles No. 24 quickly proved to be the ideal choice for people on a budget. For $64.99, it offers excellent value for money, with standout features like a sleek design and phenomenal build quality, rivaling most high-end brands that cost three times more. Its impressive attention to detail was evident from the get-go, with our writers highlighting how every curve and texture variation felt well thought out. Among the review samples we tested in the price range, Icicles No. 24 was more thrilling to use, and handling was the best because of the multiple tentacles designed to get you off from the first thrust.

Away from the competitive pricing, our testers pointed out how the exciting design with an ever-changing shape made handling easier because it limited hand movements. “The quality of sensations changes depending on how you hold Icicles No. 24,” says Rachel Sommer. “It looked like a seahorse from one side but there were also hints of a tantalizing thick tongue or a rock-solid penis depending on the angle you look at it from.

Icicles No. 24’s well-measured sculpture offers consumers a sleek and alluring piece that oozes class as much as it lays the foundation for intense orgasms. As you can see in the image above, the textured tentacles and colorful borosilicate glass blended timelessness and sophistication, making it stand out, especially for a budget-friendly glass dildo. More importantly, the rounded head greatly simplified penetration and enhanced the feeling of fullness with every thrust.

How about the stimulation? Well, the emphasis was on enhancing the feeling of fullness, while offering intense sensations from the tentacles gliding against your vaginal walls. Its rounded edge meant more surface area, making landing on your sweet spots easier. In addition, the S-shaped design and extended seahorse tail offered more ways to use the model, with every shape offering a unique form of stimulation.

Something else that stood out was how easy it was to use Icicles No. 24. Glass toys are usually reserved for the most experienced users because of the intense sensations and complicated handling. However, you don’t need to be a seasoned monster dildo connoisseur to use this one. “It was the easiest among the models we tested,” says Sandra Larson. The extended stem and curled tail significantly enhanced handling and made it more comfortable.

The testers also highlighted the build quality, with Rachel Sommer describing it as phenomenal. “The glass is handblown, so no two products are similar,” says Ms. Sommer. “Everything from the beautiful pink hue to the solid and durable borosilicate glass gives what looks like a fragile product a beautiful outlook.” In addition, the glass felt solid even after repeated use, and its waterproofness and non-porosity make it easy to clean and aquatic play-ready.

The impressive craftsmanship showcased the brand’s commitment to user satisfaction. Everything from the smooth glass material to the multiple tentacles on the body made for an excellent stroking experience. Even with an all-glass design, it didn’t feel fragile.

Lastly, the versatile tentacle dildo offers unlimited possibilities for different users and scenarios., Whether by yourself or with a loved one, incorporating the product into the bedroom was flawless. And even if your partner doesn’t like it in the ass, having them use it on you is an experience on its own. More importantly, the temperature-responsive piece lets you enjoy cool or warm sensations by submerging it in water for a few minutes before use.

Minor issues we found during testing:

Unfortunately, the tentacles on the body can be intimidating for beginners. Of course, they’re part of what makes Icicles No. 24 more exciting, but they also add to the friction, which people with sensitive skin or newbies will dread initially.

Our testers complained about the surprisingly underwhelming unboxing experience. The product didn’t include promotional materials like lube or a storage bag.

Why Icicles No. 24 is our budget pick:

• Price: The Icicles No. 24 was the most affordable of the tested models, at $64.99. Most models offering similar features were closer to the $100 mark than the $50 one. In addition, it was the most impressive in terms of design and build quality. Handling was straightforward, and the tentacles amplified the quality of sensations, making each thrust count.
• Versatility: As stressed before, the glass dildo is more than a one-size piece. Its extended tail and seahorse shape significantly simplified the user experience. Whether playing solo or with your lover, it added possibilities to the experience. More importantly, its non-porous and waterproof design simplified cleaning and made Icicles No. 24 aquatic play-ready.
• Build Quality: The brand uses handblown glass to make every product unique. No two pieces are identical, thus enhancing satisfaction and making the sessions feel a bit exclusive. The borosilicate glass is among the toughest materials, and even with the colorful finish and multiple tentacles, it feels sturdy after repeated use. The top-tier craftsmanship enhanced the user experience, with every curve and bump amplifying the intensity.

If you want to see what Icicles No. 24 looks like and how to use it, please watch my unboxing and demonstration video below (it’s the fourth product in the YouTube video):

You can learn more about Icicles No. 24 in our extensive review.

Features:

• Material: Borosilicate glass
• Usable Length: 4.5″
• Width: 1.5″

Pros:

• The most affordable monster dildo.
• Exciting versatility.
• Phenomenal build quality.
• Satisfying tentacle texture.
• Suitable seahorse tail handle.
• One-year warranty.

Cons:

• It can be intimidating.
• Underwhelming packaging.

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4. Mr. Hankey’s Beowulf: Best Canine Dildo!

Why we love Beowulf Fantasy Dildo:

Derived from an epic English poem (c. 975–1025 AD), Beowulf is thought to be a kenning of a bear, emphasizing fierce and monstrous features. The ensuing chaos throughout the poem underlines Beowulf’s heroic actions. The canine dildo’s distinctive flair and thick shaft offer users a peek into the exciting stretching sessions to come.

Beowulf is perfect for those looking to test their limits. Its extended shaft and varying shapes from the tip to the base offer a formidable yet exciting challenge. “There was no denying the raw and animalistic edge, which made it ideal for singles and couples,” says Rachel Sommer. The robust design and availability in multiple sizes mean everyone was well catered for, including the most experienced folks.

Beowulf’s widening design was an exciting reason we picked it as the highest-rated canine dildo. We thought it laid the foundation for gentle stretching, with the gradual switch in size from the tip to the knot in the center offering exciting sensations. “It was a unique experience,” says Rachel Sommer. “Its knot was unlike the rest: it featured multiple strands of muscle with more impact yet zero discomfort.”

Although the large and XL sizes could be overwhelming, the small and medium sizes were more accommodating. For instance, the medium was only 9 inches wide (circumference) and 10.25 inches long (usable length), perfectly balancing fullness and coziness. Every stroking action was satisfying with the multiple shapes and size variations throughout the shaft.

Something else about the design that stood out was the T-shaped base (image above) because it simplified handling. It also prevented unwanted travel so you don’t end up in the ER if you decide to explore anal play. I’ve been to the ER several times, and I’d hate to be the patient with a dildo stuck in her backside,” says Sandra Larson.

How about its versatility? The Beowulf’s ergonomic shape and comparatively easy-to-use design made it ideal for solo users and couples seeking to enhance their sex lives. Despite the bully persona and massive dimensions, you’ll be glad to learn about its availability in multiple sizes because it means you can pick the right shape and size for your sexual needs. In addition, you can further customize the color and density for the ultimate customized experience. All sizes except the XL allow users to add a Vac-U-Lock hole so you can connect it to a sex machine, harness, or suction cup base for hands-free sensations.

Sandra Larson described the sensations as borderline addictive. “Getting the right words to describe the sensations is hard, but the feeling of fullness gradually ballooned into immense excitement as the dildo slid deeper inside the pussy, making for a gentle stretching experience.”

Getting the right angle and position took a while, but once you mastered it, things became more seamless. How easy it is to stimulate the G-spot or P-spot depends on who you ask, but the consensus was that penetration was easier because of the tapered design. Of course, easy is relative, but we’ve reviewed more intimidating monster dildos.

The testers highlighted the impressive build quality, lauding the brand’s commitment to user satisfaction. “We loved that Mr. Hankey’s Toys used high-quality silicone for the monster dildo because it’s the best sex toy material,” says Rachel Sommer. “Besides its durability and versatility, the non-porous material was easy to clean and exciting to use in the shower or bath.” More importantly, after repeated use, we didn’t notice any foul smell or discoloration.

Minor issues we found during testing:

Our primary concern was its massive size and shape. Like other monster dildos, it’s reserved for the most experienced users, and newbies should buy something else.

In addition, the silicone material picked up dust and lint quickly. Be ready to clean Beowulf more often than your other sex toys.

Why Mr. Hankey’s Beowulf is our favorite canine dildo:

• Design: Beowulf’s long-standing history made the experience more exciting for fantasy-themed poem fans. The sheer size and impressive innovation to mimic the mythical creature were exceptional, with every bulge and curve offering measured resistance to the thrusting experience. “I couldn’t make my mind up on whether it was overwhelming or overly fulfilling,” says Rachel Sommer. “Such are the dynamics, but mine was more of an appreciation for a brand that struck the perfect balance between fantasy and practicality.”
• Versatility: The monster dildo’s dynamic design was perfect for solo users and couples. Like other monster picks, it was available in multiple sizes, allowing you to pick your poison, matching experience, and sexual needs with the perfect shape and size. In addition, the brand allowed users to customize their purchase by selecting specific density and color variations. And with accessories like the Vau-U-Lock hole that made it easy to attach it to a sex machine, harness, or suction cup base, the possibilities were endless.
• Build Quality: Our testers loved the high-quality silicone material because it made the dildo durable and flexible. It’s the best in the industry thanks to its non-porosity and waterproofness, which simplify cleaning and allow for exciting escapades in the shower. More importantly, the attention to detail in the shape variation and bulging stem amplified the quality of sensations.

If you want to see what the Beowulf Fantasy Dildo looks like and how to use it, please watch my unboxing and demonstration video below (It’s the third product in the YouTube video):

You can learn more about the Beowulf Fantasy Dildo in our extensive review.

Features:

• Material: Silicone
• Usable Length: 9″ – 13″
• Girth: 8″ – 12″

Pros:

• A well-thought-out canine design.
• The massive size is ideal for size queens.
• Its tapered design simplifies penetration.
• There are four sizes available.
• Impressive build quality.
• It’s Vac-U-Lock-compatible.

Cons:

• It collects dust quickly.
• Beowulf is reserved for the most experienced users.

View On Mr. Hankey’s

 

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5. Uberrime Ardor: Beginner-Friendly!

Why we love Uberrime Ardor:

Among the many things we loved about Uberrime Ardor, its impressive design was the highlight. Our testers pointed out how the brand’s priority to blend fantasy and practicality made it the most beginner-friendly pick. Unlike other monster dildos we tested that focused on harsh textures and extreme intensity, it was more geared toward usability. The meaty silicone material and overall squishy texture meant even the knot was cozy and easy to manipulate to avoid discomfort.

As you can see in the image below, its well-thought-out design included a tapered design to simplify penetration and lay the foundation for gentle stretching sessions. The silicone material was squishier than firmer, making it easy to manipulate during penetration. The team found it easy to switch the angles and sex positions for the ultimate comfort and satisfaction.

Uberrime’s tapered design with a sharp head that gradually widened towards the center made penetration easy. It also made the stretching experience gentler and more accommodating for beginners and those with sensitive skin. This, coupled with the subtle node and overly squishy material, significantly enhanced the user experience, making the monster dildo perfect for beginners.

Our only concern with Ardor was that some users would describe it as overly squishy (We test the flexibility in the below YouTube video). Of course, that’s the reason why newbies love it, but it completely alienates intermediate and experienced folks. Those seeking a rock-hard dildo and intense stretching will find the Ardor a bit underwhelming.

Unlike other monster dildos we tested, the team loved how the whole idea behind Ardor was to gently stretch the vagina or anal orifice without feeling overwhelming: the perfect MO for a beginner. Its textured plates on the underside, a knot in the middle, and bumpy texture on the upper side were well balanced, ensuring the drag and tug were satisfying with every stroking action.

According to our product test lead Sandra Larson, the slow and measured thrusts offered a unique glimpse into what a monster dildo can be without overly exaggerating the realms of reality. “The slow thrusts and feeling of fullness were unlike anything I’ve experienced with similar products,” says Sandra. “The gentler approach was incredibly fulfilling, a complete opposite of the combative ‘in your face’ sensations.”

Our testers also praised the brand for designing one of the most versatile models in the collection. The model offered multiple possibilities regardless of who is using it or the scenario. Whether solo or with your loved one, there’s something for everyone. In addition, you can get the small or medium version depending on how much of a beginner you are.

Like the other review samples, the build quality was outstanding. Everything from using platinum-grade silicone material to the impressive attention to detail made it stand out. Silicone is the best sex toy material, thanks to its remarkable hygiene and durability metrics. In addition, it’s waterproof and non-porous, simplifying cleaning and making it perfect for aquatic fun.

Minor issues we found during testing:

Some people will find the overly squishy material to be overwhelming. Of course, that makes it perfect for newbies, but some reviewers voiced their disappointment with the wobbly density.

In addition, Ardor is a bit expensive for some beginners exploring monster dildos. It costs between $109 and $119, which can be pricey for newbies.

Why Uberrime Ardor is the most beginner-friendly:

• Design: Uberrime Ardor’s ergonomic design was the primary reason we picked it as the highest-performing monster dildo for beginners. The well-thought-out fantasy and functionality blend offered a glimpse into what a mythical dildo would look like if the brand catered to the needs of the user without taking away the thrill of fantasy. A combination of a tapered shape to simplify penetration and a formidable knot for a bit of resistance during stroking made for an exciting look and feel.
• Versatility: The model’s cozy density and smooth silicone finish made it an exciting pick for beginners and those with sensitive skin. The piece offers numerous possibilities, whether alone or with a loved one. Its waterproof design also lets you take the excitement to the bath or shower, while its availability in two sizes means you can customize the experience for utmost satisfaction.

If you want to see what the Ardor Dragon Dildo looks like and how to use it, please watch my unboxing and demonstration video below:

You can learn more about Ardor Dragon of Lust in this extensive review article.

Features:

• Material: Silicone
• Insertable Length: 5″ – 6.5″
• Diameter: 1.75″ – 2.31″

Pros:

• One of the most ergonomic designs.
• A cozy knot in the center.
• The tapered head simplifies penetration.
• A dynamic pick.
• Platinum-grade silicone material.
• There are two size options available.

Cons:

• The size can be intimidating to the eyes.
• It’s a bit pricey – $109 – $119.

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6. Lovense Sex Machine: Monster Machine Dildo!

Why we love Lovense Sex Machine:

The Lovense sex machine is our preferred thrusting monster machine dildo. Unlike its closest rival, Hismith, the fuck machine’s turbo gear motor is ultra-powerful. I don’t know about your sex machine history, but I doubt anyone will walk away from the experience wanting more.

Something that stood out during the review was the versatility. As you can see in the image below, the Lovense sex machine came with two adapters, making it easy for me to switch between my sex toy collection. And if the adapters weren’t enough, the sex machine is also Vac-U-Lock compatible, which was massively convenient because most of my dildos have a Vac-U-Lock attachment.

The testers also appreciated the dual-thrusting mechanism that made the sex machine stand out. I don’t know how many people will be head over heels for this, but my fiancé Jessica couldn’t wait to try it out. It took a while to set both rods up but enjoying synchronized thrusting power from both ends with her was worth the wait.

The hallmark of the review was the sex machine’s compatibility with the Lovense Remote app (screenshots below) – the top sex toy application. Besides simplifying control, the mobile app offered unique bells and whistles, including music sync and multiple customization options. In addition, the app made the mechanical monster dildo perfect for long-distance lovers because of the universal control.

The package included two silicone dongs with balls, differently sized, so you can switch between the two to match your sexual desire and experience. For some reason, the dildos looked and felt cheap, with a weird plasticky smell – a weird observation because they are made from silicone.

If you don’t feel like using the mobile app, the sex machine has a classic dial controller, which you can see in the image below. And while you won’t get half of the features in the mobile application, the simple controller lets you enjoy a quick dip into pleasure land without needing to connect to a Wi-Fi network.

Minor issues we noted found during testing:

Notably, the machine was loud and a bit unstable, with an annoying crackling noise when cranked to the highest setting. It brought back old washing machine vibes.

Unfortunately, the included dildos had a strong plasticky smell. In addition, they felt a bit poorly made, and you’ll have to use other monster toys in your sex toy collection.

Assembly wasn’t a highlight of my experience with the Lovense sex machine. It took time, and the mandatory unscrewing and screwing of the steel rods to adjust the stroke length was borderline annoying.

Why Lovense Sex Machine is the best monster machine dildo:

• Design: The sex machine got the highest score on the design spectrum. The testers highlighted the importance of solid stainless steel bars. Unlike the hollow pipes used by other competitors, they’re firm and stable (97% test panel approval). In addition, the sex machine was the most powerful among the ones we reviewed.
• Control: The Lovense sex machine’s compatibility with the Lovense Remote app was impressive. The mobile application is the most effective on the market, and besides simplifying control, it opens your world to new possibilities. In addition, the package included a classic dial controller for a quick and easy thrusting experience.
• Build Quality: Versatility was a huge part of the experience. The designers ensured you get the highest quality while offering multiple play options with the two motors and Vac-U-Lock compatibility features.

If you want to see what the Lovense Sex Machine looks like and how to use it, please watch our unboxing and demonstration video below:

You can read our Lovense fucking Machine review here.

Features:

• Material: Stainless Steel, Silicone
• Stroke Length: 4.5″

Pros:

• It’s compatible with the Lovense Remote app.
• The dial controller also simplifies control.
• Impressive solid stainless steel build.
• Unique dual thrusting mechanism.
• Versatile sex machine with two silicone dildos and adapters.

Cons:

• It’s more expensive than other sex machines we reviewed.
• Assembly and adjusting the stroke length can be annoying.

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Other Good Alternatives

Hankey’s Sigmaloid‘s slim, finger-like design makes it perfect for anal play. Unlike the other chunky options, it’s easier to insert inside the tighter anal orifice. Its bendy structure is easy to manipulate during use to target specific spots inside, meaning you won’t have to struggle to hit the prostate. More importantly, it’s available in three sizes, and you can add an attachment hole (except on the XS) to use it with a sex machine, harness, or suction cup base.

Hankey’s Davy’s Tendrils offers an exciting opportunity for thrill seekers to enjoy hands-free monster thrusting. Its swirling tendrils mimic the tentacles of ocean creatures, letting you live out your wildest fantasies. More importantly, it’s compatible with a Vac-U-Lock hole so that you can attach it to a sex machine or harness for a completely hands-free experience. We tested it with a few harnesses and the Hismith sex machine, and it worked like a charm. More importantly, its tapered design enhanced the user experience, making penetration easy and the stretching experience gentle yet thrilling.

Fusion Lil’ Squirt is our favorite squirting monster dildo. The syringe squirt mechanism excited testers because it was neat and easy to use. And while the syringe did get in the way during use, the ease of use was a worthy price to pay. The non-intimidating design, relatively short length, and smooth texture made it perfect for beginners. In addition, the bulbous body enhanced the pleasure, complementing the animated squirting mechanism. You can check out more squirting dildos in this review.

 

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Types of Monster Dildos

Some of the common types of monster dildos include the following:

Dragon Dildos

Made to resemble a dragon dick, dragon sex toys are the most common type in this niche and have exciting designs meant to capture the wild thoughts of some of the most-acclaimed sex toy designers. You find more dragon dildos right here.

Alien Dildos

Like dragons, the Alien sex toys feature incredible designs mirrored against mythical creatures, Aliens. They’re available in multiple sizes and shapes to meet the ever-changing needs of the vast sex toy industry. You can find more alien dildos right here.

Tentacle Dildos

Constructed using high-quality materials and craftsmanship, tentacle dildos feature endless rows of suckers and undulating octopus arms. You can find more tentacle dildos right here.

Other types include zombies, werewolves, vampires, and unicorns.

 

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I am Sold! Where Can I Buy Them?

Unfortunately, sex toy sale scams are among the most common online. Only buy dildos from official brand websites and authorized vendors to avoid being part of the statistics. Some of our preferred places to buy a monster dildo include the following: