How to Help Your Teen Make Doctor’s Appointments & Other Expert Tips

As a family medicine physician, I know that transitioning from pediatric to adult healthcare is one of the most overlooked parts of launching your kids into adulthood. This change is about more than finding a new doctor. You’re helping your young adult learn to advocate for themselves while figuring out your new role as their support system rather than the primary person making all their healthcare decisions.

Understanding the New Landscape

Once your child turns 18, national laws completely change your relationship with their healthcare. You can’t automatically get their medical information or make medical decisions for them. I know this feels strange at first, but it’s actually a good opportunity to help them develop important adulting skills. If they’re comfortable with it, have them sign a HIPAA authorization form so you can still access their medical information during emergencies or major health decisions.

Finding the Right Primary Care Provider

The first step is helping your teen understand that finding a healthcare provider is sort of like dating. You want to find the right match. Schedule a “meet and greet” appointment with a Primary care and OB-GYN clinician, whether they’re an MD, DO, PA, or APRN. This appointment isn’t for handling urgent problems. Think of it as checking if the vibes are right. Does your child feel comfortable asking questions? Does the provider listen and explain things clearly? Is the clinician comfortable discussing health topics your teen has learned about on TikTok or other social media? Just like with dating, if they don’t hit it off, your teen can try with another clinician.

It’s also become extremely normal for young adults who don’t have ongoing health conditions or take regular medications, to choose to skip establishing care with a primary care provider initially. Instead, they’ll identify an urgent care center covered by their insurance and go there when they need care.  As a physician, I believe it’s OK to use urgent care for those unexpected injuries and illnesses. However, it’s good to have a primary care doctor too — as someone who knows your complete medical history, they can become your health advocate when you need it.

Navigating College Health Systems

Not every teen plans to attend college, but for those who do, college health centers offer significant advantages: they’re convenient, affordable, and the providers understand the unique challenges college students face. The downside is that services might be limited during breaks and summer sessions. Help your young adult understand what their college health center offers and what might require outside referrals. Many students use campus health for routine care while maintaining relationships with specialists from home. If your child is attending university, encourage them to start with the campus resources for cost and convenience. However, be aware that they can also access off-campus care options. 

Know Your Health History

This transition reveals a significant gap in how families communicate about health. Your young adult needs to understand their complete medical history, including allergies, current medications, and most importantly, why they take each medication. Even young adults with chronic conditions like asthma or diabetes may struggle to manage their health independently, not because they’re irresponsible, but because you’ve been the primary decision-maker and health advocate throughout their adolescence. They may not fully understand the day-to-day requirements of managing their conditions or know crucial details like medication allergies, their complete diagnosis list, or family health history.

I’ve seen countless young adult patients frantically calling their parents from my office because they can’t answer basic questions about their health. This scrambling often happens at the worst possible moments when they’re already sick or dealing with a health crisis.

If your child takes medications, ensure they understand the names (both generic and brand names), dosages, the reason for taking the drug, and the importance of consistency. This knowledge becomes essential during emergencies or when establishing care with new clinicians. 

Teach them to keep a medication list of this information on their phone so it’s easy to access. At every medical appointment, they will ask about their medications and allergies. They should also be prepared that they might be asked to share information about their sexual health and drug or alcohol use. 

Emergency vs. Urgent Care

It’s important to teach your young adult about the difference between urgent care (for things like minor injuries, infections, or illness) and emergency care (for chest pain, serious injuries, difficulty breathing, or anyone nonresponsive). Understanding when to use each one can save money, ensure they get appropriate care, and help them help their friends, too. 

Prevention and Ongoing Care

Those 18 and older should stay current with important vaccinations, including annual flu shots to prevent seasonal influenza; the HPV vaccine series, which protects against human papillomavirus and reduces cervical cancer risk, ideally completed before age 26; meningitis vaccines to prevent serious bacterial infections common in college settings; and tetanus boosters every 10 years for wound protection. They should also get screened for sexually transmitted infections when sexually active, even if they don’t have any symptoms. Young women should begin regular Pap smears at age 21 to screen for cervical cancer and precancerous changes, regardless of sexual activity, and be informed about options for birth control, such as birth control pills, IUDs, implants, or other methods that best fit their health needs and lifestyle.

Help them set up their patient portals, understand their telemedicine options, and learn how to communicate with their clinician between visits. Not everyone realizes that anything they write in a patient portal is part of their permanent medical record.

Your Evolving Role as a Parent

Your role shifts from healthcare director to consultant. Be available for guidance while encouraging independence. Help them organize their important health documents, understand their insurance benefits, and prepare questions for appointments. Remember, this transition takes time. Some young adults will be ready to handle everything independently, while others will need more gradual support.

When you prepare your child with these tools and knowledge, you’re setting them up for a lifetime of success to advocate for the healthcare they deserve. That’s one of the most valuable things you can give them as they learn to be their own Chief Medical Officer.  

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