A Guide To Making Flirting Fun Again

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On July 10, 2025

Last updated:July 10, 2025

Flirting is the foundation of connection – it’s been a technique to show interest and communicate with another person for centuries. However, flirtatious behavior can be hard to detect, and mustering up the courage to flirt with a stranger can be daunting.

Studies suggest that people are more likely to flirt if they’re in a committed romantic relationship rather than with a new person. It makes sense – putting yourself out there is scary. If you want to know how to flirt without being creepy

So, how can you transform nervousness into charisma, drawing people towards you rather than away? We’re here to help you figure out how to flirt without letting nerves or awkwardness take over.

Make Eye Contact, but Don’t Stare!

Stolen glances across the room can be sexy. Staring is not.

In fact, staring is a major don’t in the guidebook of how to flirt without being creepy. Eye contact is the first step to flirting, and it’s not as intimidating as verbally initiating with someone.

You can hold it for a little longer than normal, but if you hold it too long, be mindful that it can go into creepy territory. Since some people struggle with social cues, it’s a good rule of thumb to not look at someone directly for more than five seconds.

Don’t be afraid to let that gaze drift if you’re chatting with friends and see that person on the other side of the room.

Use the Right Body Language (and Read Theirs)

Another non-verbal way to flirt beyond eye contact is by using the right body language. This 2018 study says that behavior like learning toward someone and lightly touching them can be effective – in the right circumstances.

If you’re a woman, part of knowing how to flirt with a guy is all in the expression and body language. Slightly tilt your head to the side and lean in towards their body during conversation to indicate interest and attention. In fact, all genders can lean in and smile warmly. Remember to smile flirtatiously so the other person can decipher between flirting vs. friendly. Getting physically closer is also effective.

You can take things to the next level by gently touching their arm and laughing. Don’t forget to keep your body language open. Research indicates that having a relaxed posture and keeping your torso exposed (rather than crossing arms) displays dominance in a way that comes off as confident, approachable, and friendly.

Start slow and implement the lean-in, trying out prolonged eye contact. Not sure how to tell if a guy is flirting with you? Guys and girls can both consider it a green light if the other person starts mirroring (giving you the same signals back). If they don’t return the cues, respect their boundaries and move on.

Make Them Laugh

There’s no better feeling than making your crush laugh. You can accomplish this by several means. You can try an intentionally corny pickup line, have a dance-off, play games like Would You Rather, or shoot your shot with a joke. Even a classic dad joke, as cringy as it may sound, can act as an icebreaker.

Don’t be afraid to get creative and express your personal sense of humor. Being comedically compatible and laughing at the same things together is essential to a relationship.

Use Your Instincts

No matter how into someone you might be, considering their feelings and gauging mutual interest is just as important, so don’t be self-aware and don’t go overboard.

Reading the other person’s energy and seeing how comfortable they are is vital – especially if you’re considering physical touch as a means of flirting. Someone may not be open to a sensual massage or physical contact.

Additionally, not all laughter means they want you to continue. Sometimes, people laugh out of nervousness – especially women trying to diffuse tension when they’re feeling uncomfortable in front of a man. Mastering how to flirt without being creepy means acknowledging this.

Pay Attention to Conversation Cues

Did your crush recently take a trip somewhere or mention their favorite restaurant or hobbies? Show that you have good listening skills. Ask them more questions about what they’ve told you about, and avoid ‘yes’ or ‘no’ questions at all costs. Share interesting tidbits about yourself without dominating the conversation, which can display attention-seeking and narcissistic behavior.

Awkward silence can make others perceive you as creepy (or boring), but if you find it difficult just to maintain a basic conversation, it’s a good sign that this might not be the right match for you.

End the Conversation Positively and Clearly

Don’t play hard to get. You can still be mysterious while expressing interest in someone. In fact, this shows confidence and is likely to keep you on their mind for longer.

Don’t be demanding, but don’t be afraid to take the leap and ask for their number. You might say something like, “I don’t know about you, but I had an awesome time getting to know you tonight and would love to see you again.”

Take a Hint

Unfortunately, flirting doesn’t always work out. This is the first thing to remember if you’re unsure of how to flirt without being creepy. Don’t press the matter if you go for it and learn that someone else isn’t interested. Statistically, women are more likely to detect and perceive creepiness as a sexual threat.

For people wondering: doesn’t flirting lead to sex? The answer isn’t a definite yes – respecting someone and enacting consent must always come first.

Regardless of gender, if you’re flirting with someone and they seem uncomfortable or disinterested or are giving you the cold shoulder, no means no. Take a hint and focus on something (or someone) else.

Trust the Process

Flirting is often perceived as subtle and indirect. In fact, researchers have found that it generally has a detection rate of 28%.

So, while you should absolutely use common sense to determine mutual interest, don’t be afraid to explore the possibilities and put your best self forward with our top tips on how to flirt with women and men. It might just stop you from getting overlooked and friend-zoned!

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