How to Use a Double-Ended Dildo? TIPS from a Sex Toy Tester!

Double-ended dildos can be double the fun, whether you’re playing with a partner or on your own. You may feel intimidated by them, but you really shouldn’t. They come in a variety of shapes and sizes so you should have no problem finding one that appeals to you.

I’m Sandra Larson, and I’m a sex educator and product tester with years of experience working with couples and singles. We’re going to talk through some of the best ways to play with a double-ended dildo, so keep reading!

Why a Double-Ended Dildo?

A double-ended dildo is a great way to share a sensual experience with your partner. It’s especially well suited for couples with two vulvas and zero penises, but any two people can find ways to play. Sharing a sex toy and moving together is a very intimate experience, and it can open up new dynamics with your partner.

If you are not partnered (or even if you are, but you want to play solo), a double-ended dildo allows you to stimulate at least two of your favorite erogenous zones at the same time. Or, if you choose a toy with different sizes or textures on each head, you can easily switch it up mid-session.

Getting Ready!

As with any sex toy, especially one that you will use internally, you will want to make sure that you have good-quality lube and plenty of it within easy reach. Water-based lube is the gold standard because it is safe to use with all sex toys (and with condoms, if those are part of your partnered sex). Even the best water-based lubes can dry out during vigorous or extended play times, though, so do not hesitate to reapply as necessary.

Other options include oil-based lubes (or body-safe food-grade oils), which are safe to use with non-porous sex toys like stainless steel, borosilicate glass, or most medical-grade silicone. Be aware that many double-ended dildos are crafted to be flexible, and most flexible plastics are porous and therefore not safe to use with oil-based lubes. Silicone lubes are also available, but should not be used with silicone sex toys.

Prep is more than just props, though. You will enjoy any sort of penetration much more if your body is ready and relaxed. Make up your bed with soft sheets and blankets, take a hot bath, and put on your favorite music.

Using a Double-Ended Dildo With a Partner

Pretty much any position that people use for penis-in-vagina penetrative sex can also be used for penetrative sex with a double-ended dildo.

• Missionary: This is generally considered to be the most intimate position. One partner lies on their back and the other partner lies on top. This allows for kissing and plenty of full-body contact. It works best when there is not a significant height difference between partners, although when there’s a will, there’s a way!
• Side-Facing: This is also a very intimate position. Partners lie on their sides, facing each other. You can maintain eye contact, kiss, and embrace while fully connected.
• Spooning: Some people think of this as “lazy” sex, but that’s not a complaint! It can be very relaxing and it’s easy to fall asleep together afterwards. Partners lie on their sides facing the same direction, with one partner (the big spoon) behind the other and penetrating from the rear.
• Scissoring: Partners lie on their sides facing opposite directions with legs intertwined. Both partners can experience very deep penetration in this position and it allows each person to find their rhythm independently, which is more difficult in other positions.

Going Solo

Double-ended dildos are great to share with a partner, but you can absolutely keep them all to yourself if you prefer! If you want to experiment with double penetration but don’t want to deal with two other whole bodies, this is the way. You will obviously want to choose a very flexible double-ended dildo for this; however, as we mentioned above, more flexible plastics are difficult to thoroughly clean and sanitize, so we would recommend using a condom at least on the part that’s knocking at your back door.

You can also try using one end internally to target your G-spot and the other end on your clitoris. Or if you have a double-ended dildo with different sizes and textures on each end, you can go back and forth between them for a sweet little smorgasbord of stimulation.

Cleaning and Care

All sex toys should be thoroughly cleaned after every use, but this is even more important when there are two sets of bodily fluids and skin cells in the mix, along with larger helpings of lube.

Start by wiping off any leftovers with a clean, soft cloth. If your double-ended dildo is waterproof, wash it well under warm running water with mild fragrance-free soap. If it is a flexible porous material, clean it with specialized sex toy cleaner or follow the manufacturer’s recommendations. Be sure to pay special attention to any ridges, ribs, or textured areas. Pat dry with a soft lint-free towel and allow to air dry completely before storing it away.

And even if you’ve only used one end of your double-ended dildo, you should clean the whole thing! You would absolutely expect a restaurant to wash all the dishes from the table even if some of them hadn’t really been used, wouldn’t you? And you definitely wouldn’t want your next meal to be served on those dishes that hadn’t been washed.

Common Concerns and Final Thoughts

Don’t think that you need to take the entire length of the dildo, especially if you are flying solo. We promise that it won’t feel neglected or unsatisfied if “just the tip” is what feels best for you. These sex toys are designed to have extra length to make positioning and penetration easier when there are two bodies in the mix, and some bodies are larger than others so inclusive manufacturers allow for that.

If you do feel discomfort, try adding more lube. A lack of lubrication, either natural or from a bottle, can make penetration difficult and much less fun. If that does not fix the issue, you could try a different angle. However, you should always listen to your body’s signals. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t force it. Move on to a different kind of play if you’re still in the mood, or try again another day and another way if you prefer. Again, your sex toy will not be offended.

Double-ended dildos are a fun way for couples to play together, especially couples who would not otherwise be able to share penetrative sex. There’s something very special about being physically and emotionally connected as you move together. They are also a way for people to enjoy a little variety during solo play or experiment with sensations like double penetration. We think that they are a great addition to any adult toy box, and we’d love to hear your thoughts!

Happy vibing!

Sandra

Sandra Larson founded My Sex Toy Guide in 2016 with her husband, Tim. She has been instrumental in building our website into one of the largest sexual wellness sites on the Internet, and she has tested well over 100 products over the years.
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