10 New Year’s Sex Resolutions to Spice Up Your Relationship

New year, new… you-know-what? As someone who has tested sex toys since 2016 (and used them since college), I know resolutions are not just about diet or gym. Sometimes the best changes happen in the bedroom, because the stakes are higher and the rewards so much sweeter inside those four walls.

So, to get your new year started on a high note, I put together 10 New Year’s sex resolutions to help you re-ignite your intimacy. Here you find actionable advice, personal anecdotes, and some of my favorite sex toys (of course). Plus, some of our readers shared their own sexy resolutions (You don’t want to miss them). Ready to turn up the heat? Let’s get started!

1. Schedule the Sexy Time

I totally get it. Life gets busy. Spontaneous sex is so much harder when you have busy jobs, three kids, and those addictive Netflix binges (Stranger Things, anyone?) But there’s a solution for this. Last year my wife Sandra and I started blocking out “intimacy time” in the calendar. I know, it sounds cheesy at first, but anticipation became half the fun. You see, I started to whisper erotic things or give her a mischievous smile hours before the “scheduled program” began.

One of our long-time readers, Megan, had the same idea. “Now we use the Google Calendar for all the sexy time. My hubby even sends me invites haha. Does it sound corny? You bet, but it works,” she says.

2. Try a New Sex Toy Every Month

Even a professional sex toy tester like me gets stuck in a rut sometimes. After some thinking, I realized that I mostly used penis strokers, so last year I made it my mission to try something completely new each month. After a few months (and many orgasms later) I realized that this was exactly what I needed.

Here’s another example: a few years ago, I gave my wife a surprise box full of pleasure products with monthly “assignments.” January’s toy? The Lelo Tiani 3, a wearable couples vibrator where “Netflix and chill” takes on a whole new meaning. It’s one of those resolutions that benefits everyone involved.

3. Explore Your Fantasies Guilt Free

Why don’t you propose a sex fantasy you’ve been thinking about? Maybe you want to suck your wife’s cute little toes (yummy). Or maybe you want to bring up that roleplay idea you fantasized about. I’ll admit, it took us a few years to open up about our fantasies, but now no topic is off the table, whether costumes, pleasure products, or watching a steamy film together.

One of our readers, Jeremy, had a brave moment last year: “I finally told my wife I wanted to try pegging. Her response surprised me. Took you long enough, she said. We bought a strap-on from Lovehoney the very next day.”

That’s the spirit, Jeremy!

4. Prioritize Solo Pleasure

New Year’s sex resolutions are not only for couples. And there are many ways for singles to spice up their masturbation sessions. For example, my wife Sandra swears by the Dame Arc, which is a versatile G-spot vibrator that hits all the right spots. My personal favorite, on the other hand, is the Kiiroo Keon. It’s a simple and powerful automatic stroker that can sync to online VR porn.

Making solo time a priority is self-care with benefits.

5. Communicate Before, During, and After

Communication is not always sexy but highly necessary. For example, my wife and I are doing these quick compliments + tweak chats after sex. It’s nothing complicated, just a check-in what worked and what didn’t.

It can be as simple as “What’s one thing you want us to try next time?” Simple questions like that keep things open, honest, and evolving. Trust me, these conversations bring you closer both emotionally and physically (And yes, the science backs it up).

6. Take It Out of the Bedroom

Sometimes a change of scenery is all you need. For example, a quiet corner of the house, doing it in the car, or even the backyard (if you have a privacy fence).

One of our readers, Lena from New York, shared her little trick: “We had a picnic in the backyard with champagne and a blanket. It felt like we were breaking all the rules and I loved it.” For those looking to add a little tech to their adventure, the Lovense Ferri is a discreet, wearable vibrator that works via Bluetooth. It can really add some extra spice to those special moments.

7. Be a Foreplay Master

Foreplay is half the experience. Full stop. For me, foreplay often starts long before we are even in the bedroom. It can be a cheeky text my wife sends me when I am in a meeting, or a playful comment while she is cooking dinner. Those small things really set the tone for the main dish.

If you need some help turning foreplay into a shared event the We-Vibe Wand 2 is a spicy wand vibrator that brings app-controlled teasing into your hands (literally).

8. Try Sensory Exploration

Sometimes the smaller things in life matter the most. Like a soft feather dancing on your skin, or the thrill of not knowing what comes next when you are wearing a blindfold. Temperature play is another sexy option. For example, a heated massage oil or chilled stainless steel toy works wonders. Yummy.

But why stop there? A basic Feather Tickler is an easy, affordable addition to any bedroom toolkit. You can pair it with a blindfold and suddenly every touch feels like an adventure. It’s simple, effective, and absolutely wonderful.

9. Focus on Aftercare

The final moan is not when the sex ends. Far from it. Block off some time after to reconnect. It can be cuddling, sharing a shower, or just laughing about how you knocked that lamp off the nightstand.

I like to say that aftercare is like the cool down period after a heavy workout. It helps you recover and process the shared connection.

10. Make Next Year the Year of YES!

Next year should be the year of many yeses! Say yes to new sex toys. Say yes to new fantasies. Within your comfort zone of course (consent is always a must). Maybe you looked at that vibrating wand for months, or perhaps it’s finally time to try that silly roleplay idea you keep brushing off. Whatever it is, take the leap. Life is too short for boring sex.

Final Thoughts

Most resolutions are about “doing less”. Less sugar. Less spending. Or less screen time. But for intimacy and sex, it should be more. More fun. More experimentation. And more connections.

Because your sex life deserves as much care as any other part of your life. I know, because I’ve shared more laughs than I can count during our sex toy tester sessions.

Small changes make a big difference.

Now you may be wondering what our New Year’s resolution is. Well, as someone who tried almost everything under the sun, I decided that next year is going to be all about romance. Bring my wife more flowers. Take her out on date nights more often. And of course we are going to try a lot of sex toys too 🙂

Happy vibing!

Tim

Tim is our male sex toy expert, and he has reviewed close to a hundred products. He also worked as an English teacher in Japan throughout his twenties, where he gained extensive knowledge of Japanese sex toys and Shibari. He has been featured in Vice.com, among other things.
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